Sunday, January 31, 2010

Sister!


Today is my Sister's birthday. She is now 25! The two of us have been through so much together, and I can't imagine my life without her. She is bossy and kind, silly and serious, a perfectionist and a procrastinator, and so much more. My sister makes me want to be a good person, and she makes me laugh every single day. I've been told that my daughter behaves much like Amanda did when she was young, and while this means I've got a bit of a challenge on my hands, I am proud to have another person in my life who will expect the best from me but love me at my worst.


Happy Birthday Amanda! I love you so much! In honor of your birthday, here is a Cake Wreck, because we all know that is what happens when I bake a cake.



Thursday, January 21, 2010

Not my problem

Yesterday, a friend and I dashed off campus at lunch to grab a quick bite at the nearby grocery store deli. We purchased our food and beverages and waited an inordinate amount of time for lids for our cups. As we were walking out we passed the line of people waiting to be served. Most were students from the high school, but there was one man in a very tight t-shirt. The shirt bore the image of our mascot, so I can only assume he was either a coach or an ardent fan of the high school athletics.

Well this man looked at my friend and pushed the corners of his mouth upward. Literally. With his thumb and index finger. Then he said, "You too. You both need to smile." We were literally just walking past him to leave the grocery store.

Coach Bossy, here's a newsflash. Neither myself nor my friend are obligated to look pleasant for you. Also, women will not act on your every command.

Now some might argue, "He just wants you to be happy." But that is not the case. If he cared about our emotional well being, he could have asked us if something was wrong, or he could have offered his help in some way. He didn't even smile at us. The closest thing that came to a smile was the leer he was giving my friend.

My father used to tell me to smile all the time, and while it pissed me off, it came from a place of love. My dad was worried that I was unhappy, but he was afraid of asking me what was making me unhappy because he probably already knew the answer. But when my dad asked me to smile more what he was really saying was, "I hope that you can be happy."

When Coach Bossy demanded smiles, he was saying, "Be more attractive for me, or more approachable." Guess what; how attracted you are to me is NOT. MY. PROBLEM.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Confession

I watch Teen Mom. It is actually a pretty good show. When it's predecessor, 16 and Pregnant, was on I had some issues with that show, because I felt that it was unrealistic to have an entire series about teen pregnancy without including one teen who had an abortion.

So something I have noticed about Teen Mom is that many of the mothers have a negative view of daycare. This frustrates me. As a public educator, I have great faith in public education, and I believe that education can begin early.

I still hear negative comments about having Judith in daycare while I work full time. I try to let them slide, but they really bother me. I am lucky enough to have a supportive husband and family, and they understand that I need to exercise my skills in the classroom. When I stay home for extended periods of time, I begin to be resentful and depressed. This is not fair to my daughter or myself. I can't be the only one who feels this way, but people who make deriding comments about daycare don't consider this situation.

I feel that the mothers on Teen Mom may have bought into the same idea. They may be striving for an even higher plane of motherhood perfection as a way to prove their naysayers wrong. All women, mothers included, are expected to be everyone to everybody, and when we don't meet up, it can be hard.

I often have to remind myself that I am not able to meet the expectations of people who don't even know me, nor am I obligated. I just hope that the women from Teen Mom will find feminism to help them love themselves and their children the best they can.

Updated 1/20: I do not want this to come off as me saying that those who choose to stay home are silly or doing the wrong thing, nor do I believe that all daycares are good for kids. The point of this post was to say that there are many motherhoods, and it is important that everyone finds the version that works for them.

Friday, January 1, 2010

Resolutions

I just checked my archives, and it appears that I didn't make any (public) resolutions last year. Well here I go, so you can all hold me accountable.

Personal Life

I will read at least 1 book a month that is not school related.

I will increase my yoga practice to 3 days a week.

I will increase my strength and cardiovascular practice to at least 4 days a week.

I will cook at least 1 vegetarian meal per week.

I will practice the guitar 2 times per week.

I will write at least 3 days per week.

Professional Life:

I will grade all work that is turned in within 2 days.

I will have more patience with my ESL students.

I will submit my Professional Development Dossier

I will create units that integrate students' personal lives with the curriculum.

Here's to me trying to live up to my own expectations.


About Me

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Farmington, NM, United States
Old enough to know better, young enough to change.