Sunday, March 30, 2008

On Motherhood: Part III: Returning to Work

Part I, Part II

On Monday, March 31st I will return to work. For those of you that don't know, I am a high school teacher. I have been on leave since December 19th. This will be quite a shock to my system for several reasons.

First and foremost, I have grown accustomed to spending my entire day with my daughter. She is fun, cute, and happy. I have no need to "escape" her as she doesn't scream or cry very often, and she is pretty self-contained for a three-month old. I love to watch her interact with her environment. She learns something with each touch.

Secondly, I believe that my teaching muscle has atrophied. It is as if I am returning from summer break, but my students have (hopefully) been learning in my absence. I am also not sure what I am walking into regarding the work of the substitute. What if she has decided that she doesn't need to grade anything from the beginning of the quarter? Ugh.

I had tossed around the idea of staying home permanently, but I don't think I could do it. My husband makes enough money for us to live frugally (which I would like to do anyway), and I don't need many of our luxuries. But I feel that if I stayed home I would be wasting my education, and I would also be cheating my community by depriving them of a good teacher. (No, I'm not cocky, but I know my skillz!)

I wish I lived in a world where I didn't have to make this decision, but for now, it is either stay home and feel less than complete, or go to work and feel guilty.

10 comments:

  1. The most critical years for a young baby and you're going to shovbel her off to day care. For your own selfish reasons-

    loser.

    ReplyDelete
  2. "... and I would also be cheating my community by depriving them of a good teacher."


    and at the same time cheating your daughter by abandoning her at such a young age. You feminists really are cruel basterds.

    ReplyDelete
  3. jasper, you trolling douchebag, I am not "shovbelling" her off to daycare. She is with her grandmother every day, as requested by her grandmother, her grandfather, her father, and I.

    If you would like to pay for my house, my insurance, my gas, and my food, feel free to send a check to my house every month.

    Or I could "sponge off of the government," as I'm sure a man of your leanings would really love.

    Also, feel free to avail yourself to death by fire.

    ReplyDelete
  4. "my husband makes enough money for us to live frugally (which I would like to do anyway), and I don't need many of our luxuries. But I feel that if I stayed home I would be wasting my education"

    you just contradicted yourself, you said you really didn't need the extra cash. I don't mean to be an ass but spending time/raising/taking care of your daughter is NOT a waste of time, despite what the lying feminists may tell you.

    God-bless

    ReplyDelete
  5. I don't mean to be an ass but spending time/raising/taking care of your daughter is NOT a waste of time, despite what the lying feminists may tell you.

    You are being an ass by insulting namechanged and simultaneously presuming to offer your unsolicited, patronizing directives on how she should live her life. She never said that raising her daughter was a waste of time; learn to read.

    (hi namechanged! Saw your comment at Shakesville and wandered over.)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Interesting post!

    but for now, it is either stay home and feel less than complete, or go to work and feel guilty.

    It's a difficult decision to make and I wish there were some way to accommodate a middle ground.

    ReplyDelete
  7. thanks cat, I love it when Shakers make their way here. {clicks on cat's name}

    ReplyDelete
  8. but I find I can't see cat... that's ok. Thanks for coming over.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I am many days late, namechanged, but nonetheless -- here I am.

    Make no mistake -- jasper is randyson (fwiw, I've actually researched him right down to his workplace -- yay for IP whois!) -- and he is an unmitigated ass. I recommend -- Delete. Delete. Delete.

    As to the actual post: Darlin', I think that the most primeval of primeval primates faced this -- the day when the baby is old enough that you begin to consider going out to "gather" again.

    My personal belief is: Fulfilled parents model fulfillment to their children.

    My personal childhood difficulties did not come about because my mom went back to work -- in fact, when she was miserable (because she WASN'T doing what she really wanted to do -- teach), that was miserable for me as a child. Staying with my neighbor-lady across the street (who I adored) was NOT miserable.

    Fulfilled parents create fulfilled children. I truly believe that. And I'm sending you blessings -- your kid is loved, nurtured, and protected. That, and a mom who shows her how to be fulfilled in herself, is what she truly needs.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Thanks portly dyke. I was pretty sure that jasper was randyson. And I really appreciate your support and insight.

    ReplyDelete

About Me

My photo
Farmington, NM, United States
Old enough to know better, young enough to change.